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...A little boy came downstairs crying late one night. "What's wrong?" asked his mother. "Do people really come from dust, like they said in church?" he sobbed. "In a way they do," said his mother. "And when they die so they turn back to dust?" "Yes, they do." The little boy began to cry again. "Well, under my bed there's someone either coming or going."...
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Humor and jokes
Ethnic jokes
The Americans and Russians at the height of the
arms race
realized that if they continued in the usual manner they
were going to blow up
the whole world.
One day they sat
down and decided to settle the whole dispute with one
dog fight.
They'd have five years to breed the best fighting dog in
the world and
whichever side's dog won would be entitled to dominate the
world.
The losing side would have to lay down its arms. The Russians
found
the biggest meanest Doberman and Rottweiler dogs in the world and
bred them with the biggest meanest Siberian wolves. They selected only
the biggest and strongest puppy from each litter, killed his
siblings,
and gave him all the milk. The used steroids and trainers and
after five
years came up with the biggest meanest dog the world had
ever seen. Its
cage needed steel bars that were five inches thick
and nobody could get
near it.
"When the day came for th
e fight, the Americans showed up with a
strange animal. It was a
nine foot long Dachshund. Everyone felt sorry for
the Americans
because they knew there was no way that this dog could
possibly last
ten seconds with the Russian dog.
"When the cages were opened up,
the Dachshund came out and wrapped
itself around the outside of the
ring. It had the Russian dog almost
completely surrounded. When the
Russian dog leaned over to bite the
Dachshund's neck, the
Dachshund leaned up and consumed the Russian dog in one
bite. There was
nothing left at all of the Russian dog.
The Russians came up to
the Americans shaking their heads in disbelief.
`We don't understand
how this could have happened. We had our best
people working for
five years with the meanest Doberman and Rottweiler
dogs in the world
and the biggest meanest Siberian wolves."
"That's nothing", an
American replied. "We had our best plastic
surgeons worki
ng for five years trying to make an alligator look like a
Dachshund.'"
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