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...A little boy came downstairs crying late one night. "What's wrong?" asked his mother. "Do people really come from dust, like they said in church?" he sobbed. "In a way they do," said his mother. "And when they die so they turn back to dust?" "Yes, they do." The little boy began to cry again. "Well, under my bed there's someone either coming or going."... Rakeback poker

A casino dealer and a player with a thirteen count in his hand were arguing about whether or not it was appropriate to tip the dealer. The player said, "When I get bad cards, it's not the dealers fault. Accordingly, when I get good cards, the dealer obviously had nothing to do with it so why should I tip him?" The dealer said, "When you eat out do you tip the waiter?" "Yes." "Well then, he serves you food, I'm serving you cards so you should tip me." "OK, but, the waiter gives me what I ask for...I'll take an eight." Slots Casino

Humor and jokes



One lab mouse to another: I've trained that crazy human at last. How have you done that? I don't know how, but every time I run through that maze and ring the bell, he gives me a piece of cheese.
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What do mice do when they're at home ? Mousework !
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What does a twelve-pound mouse say to a cat ? 'Here Kitty, kitty, kitty' !
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What kind of musical instrument do mice play ? A mouse organ !
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Why do mice have long tails ? Well, they'd look silly with long hair !
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Who has large antlers, a high voice and wears white gloves ? Mickey Moose !
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How do you save a drowning mouse ? Use mouse to mouse resuscitation !
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Where do hamsters come from ? Hamsterdam !
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What's a mouse's least favorite record ? What's up Pussycat !
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Why do mice need oiling ? Because they squeak !
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What do rodents say when they play bingo ? 'Eyes down for a full mouse' !
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What squeaks as it solves crimes ? Miami mice !
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What did Tom get when he locked Jerry in the freezer ? Mice cubes !
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What is a mouse's favorite record ? 'Please cheese me' !
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What have 12 legs, six eyes, three tails and can't see ? Three blind mice !
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What is small, furry and smells like bacon ? A hamster !
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Is there a mouse in the house ? No, but there's a moose on the loose !
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When should a mouse carry an umbrella ? When it's raining cats and dogs !
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What are crisp, like milk and go 'eek, eek, eek' when you eat them ? Mice Krispies !
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What is small, furry and brilliant at sword fights ? A mouseketeer !
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What do you get if you try to cross a mouse with a skunk ? Dirty looks from the mouse !
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What's the definition of a narrow squeak ? A thin mouse !
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What goes eek, eek, bang? A mouse in a minefield !
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What's gray, squeaky and hangs around in caves ? Stalagmice !
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What mouse was a Roman emperor ? Julius Cheeser !
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Who is king of all the mice ? Mouse Tse Tung !
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What do angry rodents send each other at Christmas time ? Cross mouse cards !
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What's the hardest part of milking a mouse ? Getting it to fit over a bucket !
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Hickory hickory dock. The mouse ran up the clock The clock struck one But the rest got away with minor injuries
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What's gray and furry on the inside and white on the outside ? A mouse sandwich !
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How do mice celebrate when they move home ? With a mouse warming party !
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What is a mouse's favourite game ? Hide and squeak !
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Why did the mouse eat a candle ? For some light refreshment!
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What goes dot, dot, dash, squeak ? Mouse code !
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What do you get if cross a mouse woth a packet of washing up powder ? Bubble and squeak !
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What's a mouse's favourite record ? Please cheese me !
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Do you know what a mice said when it saw a bat? Mom ! I see an angel.
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