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...A little boy came downstairs crying late one night. "What's wrong?" asked his mother. "Do people really come from dust, like they said in church?" he sobbed. "In a way they do," said his mother. "And when they die so they turn back to dust?" "Yes, they do." The little boy began to cry again. "Well, under my bed there's someone either coming or going."... Rakeback poker

A casino dealer and a player with a thirteen count in his hand were arguing about whether or not it was appropriate to tip the dealer. The player said, "When I get bad cards, it's not the dealers fault. Accordingly, when I get good cards, the dealer obviously had nothing to do with it so why should I tip him?" The dealer said, "When you eat out do you tip the waiter?" "Yes." "Well then, he serves you food, I'm serving you cards so you should tip me." "OK, but, the waiter gives me what I ask for...I'll take an eight." Slots Casino

Humor and jokes



Why are bananas never lonely? Because they hang around in bunches.
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How do you catch King Kong? Hang upside down and make a noise like a banana.
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Time flies like an arrow, but fruit flies like a banana.
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Tom: What did the banana say to the elephant? Nick: I don't know. Tom: Nothing. Bananas can't talk.
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Mandy: Our teacher went on a special banana diet. Andy: Did she lose weight? Mandy: No, but she sure could climb trees well!
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How can you tell the difference between a monster and a banana? Try picking it up. If you can't, it's either a monster or a giant banana.
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Why did the banana go out with the prune? Because he couldn't find a date.
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Why did the banana go out with the prune? Because he couldn't find a date.
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The last time I saw a face like yours I threw it a banana.
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They're not going to grow bananas any longer. Really? Why not? Because they're long enough already.
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What do you do if you see a blue banana? Try to cheer it up.
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What's yellow and writes? A ball-point banana.
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Teacher: What is Ba + Na2? Pupil: Banana.
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What is yellow and goes bzzzzzz? An electric banana.
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What's yellow and always points to the north? A magnetic banana.
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Why did the man lose his job in a fruit packing firm? He kept throwing the bent bananas away.
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How did the Mother Banana spoil the Baby Banana? She left him out in the sun too long.
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Did you hear about the unlucky man who bought some bananas? They were empty.
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Why don't bananas snore? Because they don't want to wake up the rest of the bunch.
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Why are you eating a banana with the skin on? Oh, it's all right. I know what's inside.
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What is yellow on the inside and green on the outside ? A banana dressed up as a cucumber !
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What's yellow and flashes? A banana with a loose connection.
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Mother Banana: Why didn't you go to school today? Little Banana: Because I didn't peel well.
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What would you call two banana skins ? A pair of slippers.
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What's the best way to get King Kong to sit up and beg? Wave a two-ton banana in front of his nose.
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What did the boy banana say to the girl banana? "You have a lot of appeal."
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What is the easiest way to make a banana split? Cut it in half.
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What is the difference between a banana and a bell? You can only peel (peal) the banana once.
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Why is a banana peel on the sidewalk like music? Because if you don't C sharp you'll B flat.
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What would you call two bananas? A pair of slippers.
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What is long and yellow and always points north? A magnetic banana.
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If a crocodile makes shoes, what does a banana make ? Slippers !
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What is a ghost favorite fruit ? Boonanaa !
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Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say banana ?
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Knock Knock Who's there ! Banana ! Banana who ? Banana split so ice creamed !
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How can you tell the difference between a monster and a banana? Try picking it up. If you can't, it's either a monster or a giant banana.
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